Rosetta Stone Desperately Wants Me To Learn Spanish RIGHT FUCKING NOW!

•October 24, 2014 • Leave a Comment

Over the past two months, Rosetta Stone has sent me over 120 emails.  The majority of these emails are in regard to some sort of SECRET SALE they are having.  If you aren’t aware, Spanish has 5 levels.  Each one is like $175 bucks or so.  You can usually buy them all in a group for like $600, but it’s really worth $899.  Or at least it was when I actually cared about Rosetta Stone.  I’m still on their mailing list, and although I’m going to be writing a sci-fi novel that will at least in part lean heavily on a bastardized version of Spanish, I just don’t care to be bilingual anymore.  The only people I see on a day-to-day basis speak English.  My two children make international travel downright unaffordable if not outrightly impossible.

This doesn’t stop the Rosetta people from pestering me about my failures on a daily basis.  They have secret sales, super secret sales.  Special offers where I can get the 5 levels for $219, on Columbus Day it was $209.  One day because they really didn’t give a fuck it was $199.

It’s like a bad stock and my inbox is the ticker.  The sale was supposed to end yesterday.  They emailed me 4 times that it was ending yesterday.  Today?  SALE EXTENDED 1-DAY ONLY!

$219.  LEARN SPANISH!  NOW.

Here’s some Spanish, Rosetta.  Chinga Tu Madre. Chinga Tu Madre In Su Culo, por favor.

Here’s hoping the unsubscribe link works.

The Paperback is Now Available on Amazon

•January 27, 2014 • Leave a Comment

The paperback edition of “A Million More Wishes”, my debut novel, is now available at Amazon.com.

The last time that I checked they had it for $8.90 which was 11% under the cover price.

I hope you enjoy it.

A MILLION MORE WISHES!

My First Novel Has Been Published

•January 2, 2014 • Leave a Comment

“A Million More Wishes”, the 1st book in an ongoing saga, is now available on Amazon.com, Barnes and Noble.com and Smashwords.com.

The first few chapters are available as a sample on all the sites.  The whole book can be purchased for $4.99.

Please feel free to review the book or add it to your To-Read list on Goodreads.com

Halfninja.com Review:

“McDevitt paces his story with Elmore Leonard-esque dialogue in a rapidly expanding world. An east-coast Christopher Moore. Fast paced, funny and just slightly longer than a Mexican Birth Certificate.”

Is Chris McDevitt a No Talent Assclown?

•September 13, 2013 • Leave a Comment

For many people when you type ‘is so and so’ into google, the autofinish will have hilarious results:

Is Macklemore Gay?  Is Daniel Tosh Gay? Etc Etc.  I tried this for myself, and though I waited and waited, Google had no suggestions on how to finish the phrase: “Is Chris McDevitt”.

 

so I’m hoping this blog entry will at least make it try “Is Chris McDevitt A No Talent Assclown?”  if and when anyone is ever lame enough to ask google a question regarding little old me.

Jersey Boys State 5k Run & Walk

•June 19, 2013 • Leave a Comment

Jersey Boys State 5k Run & Walk.

I’m Done With Fantasy Basketball

•April 18, 2013 • Leave a Comment

After finishing 2nd in the Way Too Hip league last year, I figured I would go ahead and play in two leagues this year.  I finished 3rd in WTH despite having to autodraft my entire team thanks to Hurricane Sandy knocking out my power for six days. In the second league, I finished 2nd, against an opponent who essentially acquaintanceraped the entire league.  The guy proposed ridiculous swap after ridiculous swap always favoring him to me about 24 times in the twenty week season.  I can only imagine that he did the same thing to everyone else in the league.

Was his team dominant?  Not during the regular season, I still finished 1st overall, however, with Kevin Garnett and a few of my key players out, I went on to lose a contentious 7-1 final matchup.  I had him in Free Throws, lost FG by .06%, lost by 36 3Pointers, 17 Assists; rebounds, steals and points were nearly 50% of my opponent’s numbers.  The two most important aspects were the fact that the guy who won talked an insane amount of trash to no one.  No one responded to his bullshit, and he kept posting it anyway.  Also, the guy who won add/dropped 157 players over the course of the season; the next highest total was 38. Personally, I only added/dropped 11.

Fantasy Basketball is nowhere near as rewarding or thrilling as Fantasy Football.  In FB, if you stay on your lineup and field the active players, you will make the playoffs.  You could have the worst possible team in the league, but if you are starting people who are actually playing, you will win at least 60% of your games.  No one remembers to set their daily lineup every week.  It just doesn’t happen in most leagues.

Quite honestly, I think there are better uses of my time.

 

Did Mitsuyo Maeda Marry a Man?

•March 19, 2013 • Leave a Comment

 

I came across this picture in the Wikipedia article for Mitsuyo Maeda, this is his wife and his ‘adopted’ daughter.  Judging by this picture Maeda married Ray Fiennes.

 
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