I have no idea what’s going on with my feet.
I’m pretty sure, I picked up some weird kind of fungus when I lived in the basement apartment on Easton ave, over a year ago. My feet were always pretty calloused from Karate and walking around barefoot, and walking on the balls of my feet like I do, but for the past year they’ve gotten increasingly nastier.
They reek, I can clear a room or a car by taking my shoes off. Plus my socks stick to my feet enough that when I start to take them off, I can spin them around like a stripper’s tassles by not peeling them from the skin first.
I’ve got the feet of an 80 year old man. Whatever the fungus or shit growing on my feet is, it’s not contagious. I’ve been showering in the same spaces as my girlfriend and my mother for over a year and they’re both Funk Free. So I don’t even know where I picked it up. It’s like some kind of foot Super AIDS. None of the athlete’s foot sprays work. If there are any podiatrist’s reading this, leave a diagnosis in the comments section, cuz I’m not wasting a co-pay on these fucked up feet.
Out of boredom, I’ve highlighted the troubled areas, just in case the flash whited out some of the bumps and gross areas. There’s really not much to this blog, but I bet its readers will never forget my feet now. So there’s that.